Well, summer is over and the new school year begins. Hopefully my last year in the public school system. FINALLY!!! When I look back at all the things that I've ever worked hard for, eagle scout, lacrosse, church, etc, school challenged me the most. I don't know if I'm just slow or lazy or what. It just seems like no matter how hard I try I always manage to mess something up. I can't wait to be done with the general studies and start working towards something that I actually am passionate about.
Its funny because if you asked me "Are you ready for college?" when I was a sophmore I would have told you that I was gonna stay in high school forever. I have to say I have a mild case of Peter Pan syndrome or maybe I just don't like change. Either way for the first time in my life I'm ready for that change. I'm ready to unfortunately leave behind my safe childhood and start the long journey to adulthood. I always compare life to hiking. For the past several years I've been hiking this one mountain and now that I'm at the top and I've had my rest I'm ready to start the next one.
Of course all of this is easy to say. In fact just thinking about leaving my friends and my comfort zone is scary to say the least. I have so many friends now that I don't want to leave. Some old and some young but I can't imagine life without them. For a while, I thought I was never going to leave vernon because of that one reason. But I know that whether I see them again or not they are still my friends and I know that I will see them again some day. I have a question that I like to ask people when I bring up this subject. Think back to a time or a place where you were comfortable and happy but you never returned to that place ever again. Think about the people. I always think about when I used to work at Maneley's. I had so many co workers that I know I will never see again. We had a ton of fun but I know I won't see them again, at least in this lifetime. Do you remember a time like that in your life? Do you ever think of those people?
I think that we are all ment to meet and befriend as many people that we can. In school I am proud to say that I have friends of all walks of life, jocks, punks, nerds, ghetto kids, etc. Its amazing even if you don't think you have something in common with someone if you just sit down and talk to them, I bet you will find something. And thats why I know we will all be fine when we leave this place.
So, on Tuesday I start the last chapter of the first book of my life. They say the end is the best part. I guess we'll have to see. I like to think of our/my trip to Scotland as the first Chapter of the next book in my life. I think its gonna be great but I need to get so much done before I get there. Most importantly a job. Speaking of the trip, I got some GPS maps from my friend, Little Man aka Kevin Cyr. They aren't as detailed as the US maps but I got coordinates from Google Earth and Transfered them into mapsource. I think that will make the parents alittle more comfortable with our trip.
I had a hard time sleeping last night. So as I always do, I thought for a long time. I kind of analyzed last year in my head. I've been on a few retreats and mission trips over the years. On one that I helped run we had a focus on how when things turn dark look for the light. When you think of it no matter how Korny it sounds, its so true. So I guess my goal for this year, besides to graduate, is to look for the light when the dark tries to swallow me up. My last ancedote for today, when I joined scouts I used to always have a flashlight on me at all times. I would often sleep with them on in my tent. If you backpack then you know that often even in summer the dark tends to sneak in on you early. The woods can be a very dark place, so I started carrying Tealites. I light a few and leave them on rocks around my tent and put one in my little lantern. Everytime, the boys come to me and ask, Why do you light candles? Are you scared of the dark? My response is always the same, "I'm not afraid of the dark, I just prefer the Light." My tealite trend caught on and the campsite looks like a small village these days.
I leave you with one of my favorite quotes "Everlasting your light will shine, when all else fades." Candles or not I always have a light. ;)
